After the big win against Slovakia last time out, the Three Lions are looking to all but secure our spot in Russia with the June game against Slovenia, followed by a double header of whipping boys Malta and Rugby team, Scotland. After that, we will face the perhaps crucial games against Lithuania and Slovakia. Today we will face Slovenia and a friendly against a bunch of guys from some place.

In other news Jose Mourinho doesn’t like me due to apparently ignoring his request – I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I also care very little.

Also, I have yet to attend a game to watch any England players. I mean… why bother when I can illegally stream it online. This, however, did not go down to well with the journalist.

The media are also starting to mention Crouch and Defore in contention for call-ups. I thought football manager was meant to be realistic? This is so…

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Ah, well… you win this time FM… but not call up is coming to either of them barring a massive injury crisis (fingers crossed).

In the world rankings, we are now above Wales who have slipped to 15th as we have held onto 12th. These rankings are soo pointless. What isn’t pointless is the premier league, and at the end of the season the table looks like this:

 

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God freaking damn it.

I rescind my previous point, the premier league is pointless and all that matters now is international football. Also, the fact Tottenham didn’t bottle it is completely unrealistic… ¬†this is truly the darkest of timelines.

Enough nonsense, into the important stuff – international football.

Alongside our games against Slovenia and the team I have not yet named, and will not yet name, and will ultimately disappoint¬†you when I say it, the U21 team are playing in the championships, so we will see how the young’uns get on.

Getting to our squad, my assistant tried to call up Charlie Austin over Theo Walcott… is he looking to get that sack? Because that’s how you end up getting the boot around here. Blasphemy.

Into the game against Slovenia, here is the squad:

 

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Slovenia draw a lot…

 

 

We have gone with our more attacking setup, not repeating our previous mistake against Slovenia. Walcott is on the bench for Oxlade-Chamberlain after the impressive performance against Slovakia has earnt him a place in the team. Kane is in for Vardy because at some point he has to become prolific for me. Also, Butland is in for Hart. The team looks good, we should have comfortably more than enough. Let’s do this.

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I guess we can call this one a success.

An excellent win, and an excellent performance. Our full backs really seem to be growing into this system and that showed with Clyne notching up a goal and an assist, and Rose grabbing a goal and two assists and the man of the match award. Elsewhere, my selection of Oxlade-Chamberlain seemed justified as he put out a strong performance, similar story for Kane.

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We could have gone three points clear if Scotland held onto Slovakia, they had been holding them to 1-1, and of course screwed it up – thanks, Scotland. We do however have a +18 goal difference compared to Slovakia’s +4.

Now a friendly against the mystery men… VENEZUELA! I told you you’d be disappointed. They were yellow like brazil… and have… Rondon maybe? Let’s hope they don’t come here and have a go at our parks and film it for Hugo Chavez… I won’t be accepting no cheques (on camera).

As I intend to do for all our smaller friendlies I will just bring you the result and explain my changes. Pretty much, we will just be playing the same shape as last game, very exciting. If we lose, right to jail, if we draw, believe it or not, jail.

 

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No jail

 

Another friendly, another interesting game. I should really cover them in more depth, but ultimately they are pretty irrelevant. Daniel Sturridge impressed with four goals, a mixture of finishes, I hope to see more of this from him as he, Vardy and Kane battle for the starting striker spot. Another assist from the fullback position is promising, and Walcott had a decent game. Defensively, we were often caught out by Venezuela’s 4-4-2, with both our centre-backs being dragged by their two strikers. Also, the direct style of Venezuela caused us issues in the first half, conceding early. Ultimately though, our style pulled through.

For only two games, there was a lot to get through today. Next time out, we will be playing Malta and Scotland, hopefully, this will mean a lot of goals to bring you. After that, we have crunch time as we go up against Slovakia, away, and Lithuania at Wembley. Until next time.

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